I know your pain. I know your hurt. We had an election that was stolen from us. It was a landslide election and everyone knows it, especially the other side. But you have to go home now. We have to have peace. We have to have law and order. We have to respect our great people in law and order. We don’t want anybody hurt. It’s a very tough period of time. There’s never been a time like this, where such a thing happened, where they could take it away from all of us. From me, from you, from our country. This was a fraudulent election. But we can’t play into the hands of these people. We have to have peace. So go home. We love you, you’re very special. We’ve seen what happens. You see the way others are treated that are so bad and so evil. I know you how feel. But go home and go home in peace.
I am here to deliver this message on behalf of the entire White House (breath) Let me be clear, the violence we saw yesterday at our nation’s capitol was appalling, reprehensible and antithetical to the American way (breath) We condemn it, the President and this administration in the strongest possible terms (breath) It is unacceptable (breath) and those that broke the law should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law...blah blah blah unimportant-shit blah blah...
... the violence ... was appalling ... We condemn it — the President and this administration — in the strongest possible terms ...
If a speech writer wanted an explanatory phrase (contained within two m-dashes) to be understood correctly, it would have been written:
... the violence ... was appalling ... We—the President and this administration—condemn it in the strongest possible terms ...
But McEnany read it as if it had been written:
... the violence ... was appalling ... We condemn it, the president, and the administration, in the strongest possible terms ...
Deputy Press Secretary's write press releases. It's unknown who wrote this wondrous kerfuffle, however, Deputy Press Secretary Sarah Matthews submitted her resignation during the turmoil of these events with her own statement: As someone who worked in the halls of Congress I was deeply disturbed by what I saw today. I’ll be stepping down from my role, effective immediately.
Definition of toady: In French, flagorneuse /-r; a sycophant; a person who grovels/attempts to please for personal gain. Toady is also a common misspelling of the word today.
Dear careful reader: (who might-still be holding last month's portmanteau essay in the forefront of your mind) did you wonder why I provided the french word(s) to help define toady? If so—did you try to sound-it-out? Flagorneuse [feminine form; drop-e-add-r for masculine form] flag or neuse, flag or noose . . . the Trump-instigated domestic terrorists carried many different flags and they built a platform with a noose on the capitol grounds (reportedly, to hang Vice President Pence). Five people died. One of the dead carried the Don't Tread On Me flag as she marched to the US Capitol and later died of injuries sustained by being crushed under-foot by her fellow insurrectionists (which is a much more succinct example of irony than my "I survived shirt" essay, from last month). Allegedly, another terrorist died of a heart attack after a taser discharged in his front pants pocket while he was struggling to steal a portrait off a wall (which sounds too convoluted to be true; but self-tased testicles is funny, even though it's not irony).
more vocabulary essays:
2 comments:
that is a frog because of the toes
Sincere thanks goes out to this month's winner of the most succinct and correct comment relating to the post it's appended to! The crux of frog-or-toad comes down to the toes.
Post a Comment